A Different Kind of Spooky Story
Previously I wrote a Halloween post about a possible visit from a ghost. This year it’s…
…the terrifying implications of not doing your pelvic floor exercises. Yes, you! You know you haven’t been doing them. And if you’re a man, you might not even have known that you should be doing them. But here’s why, and then how.
The reproductive system is supported in part by an interconnecting band of muscle, the largest of which is the pubococcygeus (often called PC, because who can pronounce pubo-coxa…oh, never mind!) Just like other muscles in the body, the PC starts off strong but becomes weaker with age. It is further weakened in women after the straining necessary during childbirth (and unfortunately, some women are even told that they need “surgery” to “tighten their vaginas back up” after delivery – not true!)
As we get older, the aging process, reduction in sex hormones, and lack of use due to decreased sexual activity also play a role in weakening the PC in both sexes (we don’t have the old saying “use it or lose it” for no reason.)
So who cares, right? Especially if we’re already getting a little flabby and finding that we’d just as soon eat a pizza in our recliner as go out to shake our booties with our BFFs or play soccer with our buds.
Well, you should care, and here’s why. That PC muscle that helps support the internal sex organs also helps support the bladder. When it becomes weak, we can experience the dreaded, terrifying, horrific even … (dun dun dun) … urinary incontinence! Yes! Oh, what is that, you say? That’s when you cough or sneeze and suddenly realize that you’ve leaked urine – in other words, you’ve peed in your pants. Aaiieee caramba!
Poltergeist experiencing urinary incontinence
When this begins to happen is different for different people. It began to happen to me as I became peri-menopausal in my early 40’s. And the most embarrassing part was that I was a teacher up in front of a class full of college students. You don’t get to choose when it happens! Furthermore, instead of, or in addition to, leaking, it can manifest as urine running down your legs just because you waited too long to go.
If you’re young, you might be thinking, ‘Well, I can wait till I’m about 39 to start these exercises.’ And that may be partly true. But you know what else a toned PC muscle is good for? Better sex! More ejaculatory control for men and stronger orgasms for both sexes! So that right there is a reason not to wait for your first pair of soggy underpants.
So, there’s a pretty simple way to prevent the bad and enhance the good – by doing a few simple exercises of the pelvic floor or PC (sometimes also called Kegel exercises).
Whatever your age, you might also be thinking, ‘Damn, I can’t even make it to the gym half the time – how am I going to incorporate yet another exercise into my life?’ Well, here’s some good news: These exercises take less than 5 minutes, and you can do them anywhere. Yes, anywhere! On the freeway, in bed, at church – you name it. Even on or in your partner – with their consent, of course – ooh la la!
So how do you do them? The most common instruction that I’ve seen makes absolutely no sense to me, so I’ve come up with my own. Those other sources often say, “Go to the toilet and urinate; now stop the flow of urine – you’ve just used your PC muscle!” Well, I’ve tried that and tried, and of course I can stop the flow of urine, but I’ll be damned if I can figure out what part of ‘down there’ helped me do it. So the direction that makes more sense to me is as follows:
- Women: Put your attention at the opening of your vagina. Now pull upward in that area as if trying to ‘suck’ something inside. You should feel an upward movement; THAT was your PC muscle.
- Men: Put your attention at the base of your penis, the junction where it meets the trunk of your body. Now pull upward as if trying to ‘suck’ your penis up and inside. You should feel an upward movement; THAT was your PC muscle.
Once the PC has been identified, now you do your sets and reps. Yes, just like at the gym.
- First set: Re-create that upward pulling motion 10 times. It may be slow at first, but you will get faster as the muscle strengthens. That is one set of 10 reps. Now do that twice more.
- Second set: Recreate that upward pulling motion and HOLD for a count of 10. I’ve heard it described as the sensation of an elevator going up. That is one set of 10 reps. Now do that twice more.
And now you’re done! The hardest part of these exercises (if there is one) is establishing a time and place to do them. Yes, you could just say “I’ll do them whenever,” but you’re less likely to remember than if you establish a routine. When I got serious about my PC exercises, I had a long boring commute to work. I did them in the car in the morning, and later I sometimes added the afternoon as well (the two sets of 30 begin to seem too easy very quickly). Voilá! Almost immediately I had no more worry about embarrassing myself in class. And my already good sex life got even better.
By the way, you can even add resistance (yes, another gym term) by a woman inserting something into the vagina when she does them (e.g., a finger or a vibrator) or a man becoming erect and hanging a wash cloth or towel over the erection as he does them. I kid you not!
The moral: You can’t control everything that’s scary in life. But a flabby PC muscle is one that you CAN!
Real people exercising their PC muscles
See that Happy Halloween smile?
Thank you, my husband needs lessons.
We all do, until someone teaches us! 🙂
Great article. It’s very easy to forget the importance of our bodies until we are taught. Thanks for reminding me that I have total control over my body and it’s health!
My pleasure, and I’m glad you enjoyed the read!
I really enjoyed reading you article. You article makes me improving my understanding about our reproductive system when we get older. As a result of this, I am going to incorporate pc muscle exercise into my routine life for more better sex life and avoid future problems with my reproductive system. Thank you for teaching us because if we come more knowledgeable about this topic we have the opportunity to teach others.
I’m glad you see the importance of keeping the PC muscle fit!
Thank you for the tip.
Here’s another one that I thought I had replied to. What is going on, WordPress? Anyway, you’re welcome!
This was a very informative article and thank you for the great tip!
I try to educate while having fun doing it, so I’m glad you got something out of it!
I do kegel exercises all the time, and my boyfriend also showed me how he does his. I really enjoyed your article. I will be sure to tell my sister about it because she has had some of the issues you described.
Wow, a couple! And some couples even do them at the same time (while attached, if you get my meaning! 😉 )
Interesting read though I wonder if genetics plays any role in the effectiveness of Kegal exercises/ the age of the onset of urinary incontinence.
Genetics certainly does play a role in many things about us, but we don’t usually know in advance which way it’s going to go.
I really enjoyed reading your article. In class I also learned about these excersises and I think its something I might look into doing.(:
I highly recommend it! Literally takes a couple minutes out of your day, for nearly lifelong positive effects.
This is the first post I’ve read from your blog and I’m already enjoying the content you post!
There’s quite a variety of content, so I hope you’ll keep reading!
I wish I would have read this earlier… I’m in my mid thirties and am having this issue right now… love your blog by the way .
Thank you, and you know what? You can probably solve the issue pretty quickly if you start doing the exercises!
how bad is it to hold your pee constantly?
by doing it during sex is it exactly the same way as pushing a baby out of you? I do a few exercises here and there but don’t seem to constantly be doing them. Do you recommend young adults to be doing them?
It’s not good to hold your pee because bacteria can move from your urethra into your bladder and cause a bladder infection. It’s better to urinate frequently, including after sex to wash bacteria away. No, holding pee is nothing like pushing a baby. Giving birth requires weeks of contractions of the uterus to open the cervix. And finally, yes, I do recommend that young adults do the Kegel exercises I described, because they will keep the muscles toned and healthy.
wow I never knew about this. My mom and I always joked about this. I’ve seen this new keagle product at this sex shop and it totally tracks every movement with an app on your phone. Crazy what technology can do now a days
I have a sexologist friend who says “Eventually all technology gets applied to sex.” And I think she’s right. But you still don’t need any technology to do Kegels!
My parents always warned me that when I get older I was going to have to worry about this kind of stuff, but actually realizing that it’s true makes it much more real. I’ve always laughed at kegels, but now i’m seriously interested in getting some!
They just take minutes to do, and so well worth it! I’m glad your parents are giving you a heads up – listen!
I shall show this to my husband. I was telling him about kegels because he said he has been voiding very frequently and said he hated it. I couldn’t exactly explain since I am not sure what it feels like in guys. But, I believe this should help!
It should help, especially if he gets into a daily routine (about 5 minutes a day, and he can decrease days as the muscle gets stronger). These exercises are not exactly a ‘miracle’ – but as close as I’ve ever come! Good luck!
Wow, this is some of the best information I’ve received in awhile. I am a order female and all the things that was said was true. Glad to know that there is something I can do to stop the unexpected from happening. Thank you and exercises here I come.
I’ve been fortunate to learn the things I’ve learned, and I like to pass them on!
I was honestly expecting a somewhat story but I am not angry at all, this article is great! The tip is very informative and will start to exercise my PC muscle.
Hope it helps you!
This illustrates how important Kegels really are, better sex and no more urinary incontinence, I think yes! I didn’t know it could help so much with men’s ejaculatory control. Ii’ve always heard of Kegels as an exercise for women, It’s nice to see that it can benefit both sexes.
I think yes too! Glad you learned something helpful.
I have been doing these exercises for some years now. Like you I tend to do them while driving or even sitting in classes. I have a much older friend (in her 60s) who has been having these incontinence issues for some now. I told her about the Kegels and she was shocked thinking they were for the benefits of sex. A couple of clicks on my phone and she is a practicing believer. The next time we have dinner and drinks I will be sharing this post with her. Thank You!
I wish all older and younger woman (and men) knew about the benefits of these exercises! Thanks for sharing.
This article triggered a flashback not too long ago about my Human Sexuality professor talking about PC exercises and how important they are for any age, especially if you want to control ejaculation in my case and to prevent future bladder problems. Reading this article reinforced for me to take action and start Kegel exercises!
Yay! Your professor gives good advice. 🙂
This article really helped me understand the importance of every muscle in your body, and in this case, the pelvic muscle. I am currently in a Human Sexuality class, and I remember my professor bringing this up not too long ago. She mentioned all the benefits to starting them young, and surprisingly my personal trainer cum friend told me about the use of the pelvic muscle as well. Long live Kegel exercises!!
The good news is, they’re effective at any age. But of course, they work better if you start young. Yes, long live Kegels!
Thank you for this information. I have shared it with some friends, and it never ceases to amaze me when people have no clue that something can be done about the PC muscle, let alone that we have a PC muscle!
And it especially frustrates me when women let surgeons operate on them, e.g. after childbirth, when some simple exercises would likely do!
It’s interesting to see just how important Kegel exercises are for both men and women. And who’d knew they’d be so easy to do… anywhere! I will be going to share this with friends and family.
I’m so glad! Because yes, they are really easy.
Thank you for this! Now I know the importance of working out every muscle and to start off young doing so!
I’m glad you’re taking my advice!
Thank you for providing such a useful information! We only live once. Thus, it’s important for us to stay healthy since we have a lot to do in life! I will start doing PC exercise from now on!
I’m glad to hear you want to stay healthy! Yes, sexual health is part of our health.
This is the frist time that I heard about pelvic floor exercises. Thank you for the instruction that you give in the article, and thank you for making me understand the importance of this exercises. I definitely will share this with my mom!
I love that you’re going to share with your mom!
I now have verification that I have been doing Kegel exercises right this whole time. It is a pretty simple exercise, but it seemed too simple for me. It was a almost too good to be true kind of feel for me. I do these exercises often when I’m bored (I’ve done them in class too especially if it a really boring lecture). I’ve tried the toilet technique, but I prefer the ones I have been doing. Thank you for the verification!
I never liked that whole toilet explanation – it just didn’t make sense to me (and I couldn’t feel the muscle!) I think our way is better (and I am living proof, because I was starting to experience urinary incontinence with menopause, and now it is under control.)
I really liked the simplified explanation of how to do the kegel exercises! I never thought about doing reps for these, so this is a great tip! Thanks.
And you’ll thank me again later when you stave off sexual problems and urinary incontinence! LOL 😉
Thank you for sharing your PC exercise. This will defenitly be incorporated as of this post and will share with my sisters for sure.
You’re welcome! The sooner we start, the better.
my professor talked about PC exercises and how important they are for any age, especially if you to prevent future bladder problems.
I’m glad to hear that! Your professor is awesome.
I learned about this in class and I began doing these exercises on my way to school and I’ve definitely started to see an improvement in holding my urine so I don’t have to go to the restroom frequently since I have a Ureterocele and Ive had more control due to the Kegel exercise
I’m so glad to hear that! Keep it up!
I remember my professor mentioning this in class. I never realized how common it is for older people to pee their pants, especially often when they laugh. Definitely don’t want to be one of those people lol. Thanks for the reminder!
Prevention starts now! LOL
I’m young and I almost pee myself now because I laugh to hard but if there is an exercise to keep me from soiling myself because of a good joke then definitely worth the try.
Start doing them, and in a couple weeks you may be amazed at the result!
I had no idea about the PC muscle! Its amazing how everything in your body goes hand in hand. Keep your PC muscle healthy and your bladder healthier!
And later, your body will thank you!!!
I had no idea that there was an exercise for it, and also PC muscle. I’ll definite show my girlfriend this post. First I thought it was just going to be some spooky story. Did not disappoint after reading it.
Good! But if you want a ‘real’ spooky story, check out a Halloween post from a couple years ago. I think it was just called “A Spooky Story.”
Before reading this article, the concept of “use it or lose it” relating to urination only came to mind when I was far from a restroom and really had to go. I definitely don’t want to experience urinary incontinence, so I will be sure to add kegels to my exercise regimen.
Trust me – they work!!!
Ok I will definitely start doing these I had no idea about this.Of course I know that some people tend to lose control but I was not aware that it happens so sudden.I will begin to do these soon to avoid this from happening to me. Thank you!
It can happen suddenly and younger than you might think. Luckily, these exercises work!!! Even later, but the sooner the better.
Thanks for the tip!. My Aunt always having problem about OAB (over active bladder).I wonder if this one work?
It’s certainly worth a try!
Very informative article! I literally had no idea about this and Im glad that I read this article so I can incorporate this to benefit myself.
It is a wonderful thing, and so easy to do, too!
This was very informative professor I really appreciate it. I am a student athlete But did not know that I have been working these types of muscles this entire time thank you so much this has really opened my eyes up to new things.
That was my goal! Thanks for reading.
This was a very informative piece! Also, a quite humorous one, it is good to know what muscles are being used without your knowledge. Thank you for giving me an idea about this, I will look to remember it.
It’s healthy for everyone to start doing, the younger the better!
I was expecting a story on haunted houses and not flabby PC muscles. Now I’m afraid of the flab. What’s scarier: Freddy Krueger or a flabby PC muscle? If you chose Freddy Krueger, I understand that you were too scared to choose a flabby PC muscle. Jokes aside, this blog post was very informative. I wasn’t aware of this exercise.
You crack me up! But seriously, it makes a world of difference, and the younger you start, the fewer problems you will have in the future.
Super informative and informative article! I love going to the gym but I never thought of the activities mentioned in the article as exercises. Thank you for informing me about these types of exercises, I may even try some of them myself!
You should! Your 50 year old Joshua will thank you!
I honestly found this article very interesting because like many other people my age, I worry about the stories I’ve heard about getting older, regarding not being able to control your bladder anymore, much like the one that you had. I wasn’t even aware that this was something that you can put off happening to you by simply doing pelvic exercises and I’m glad I learned this so that I can start early on and prevent the muscle from weakening.
Pelvic exercises are honestly like MAGIC! Except that they are very real-world, and overall easy.
I found this article very knowledgable! I think worrying about getting old is normal for everyone. I’m glad to learn this so that I can start early on and prevent the muscle from weakening!
Glad to hear it! We all need those strong pelvic muscles.
Thank you for the informative read, I will now pay attention to my PC muscle.
The younger the better! And yet it’s also never too late.
I learned about these a while back and have been doing them every chance I remember. It definitely happens when you least expect it. I was at work, jumping on the trampoline with one of my clients and BAM. Good thing I was wearing black workout pants. I AM 25 YEARS OLD! Ugh. Well, you really never know when it’s going to happen. I can vouch for these!
And any time you start to ‘slip,’ all you have to do is pick them back up again!
I never knew when you turn 40 (specifically for women) that can actually occur!
There are a lot of things that we find out at different stages of our lives!
Okay, this explains why I would have an “accident” when I’d sneeze after I had given birth. Lol.
LOL. Absolutely. Fortunately it’s usually a pretty easy fix (just takes a little discipline.)
Interesting read here lol. I did not know these exercises could also apply to men. Thank you for making me more well informed.
They’re good for everyone! Easy, and no drugs or surgery – just a little bit of discipline (very little – they go fast!)
I’ve actually always enjoyed doing kegel exercises, though my friends did think it was weird but now I can show them that there is a health issue if you don’t do them! Also reading that men can do them too surprised me very much and the first thing i’m going to do is bug my boyfriend about it.
Sharing the knowledge! I love it!
With a touch of biological, sexual, and comedic approach, this was a new style that I have read from this blog. It certainly contains variety, and I am completely loving it. It certainly gave me additional knowledge regarding the reproductive system and how to flourish it more. It is user friendly and direct to the point unlike those annoying textbooks that makes stuffs long, only to be talking about the same thing over and over again. Drawing from your own personal experience, it even made the substance more credible. Sex is one of Humanity’s greatest pleasures and frequently exercising the PC muscles will help boost one’s endurance and longevity. I was laughing so hard when you narrated your experience about urinary incontinence while having a lecture in a college class. That is so funny. Did that certain incident made you famous in the whole campus professor? Just kidding. I also got introduced to the Kegel exercise and it made me realize that I have been doing it for a while now without noticing it.
-Type A
I’m so glad you’re enjoying my posts! And regarding the near-accident in class, it didn’t fully happen (I just feared it might), so no one ever knew (unless they read my blog LOL). So there you are doing the exercises already – good for you! Keep it up!
I think this article can be very beneficial for many people ! It also has a comedic approach to it which makes it a fun read.
I do like to use humor in many of my blog posts. Thanks for reading!
This article did scare me a little bit as I knew nothing about this PC muscle that we have. I gained lot of information as now I want to learn more about it. Thank you for sharing this.
You’re welcome! Now start doing those Kegels LOL! 🙂
I knew Kegel exercises where for women with urinary incontinence but had no clue they were also for men. You described a better way to perform Kegel exercises than most books do. I believe this information would be helpful to others. Thank you for sharing.
You’re welcome! I never liked the instructions in books, which is why I wrote my own. I hope they help.
Hi Lynda!
This post was definitely very insightful and gave me more information about pelvic floor exercises, for some reason I was under the impression that these are different from kegel exercises but they are one in the same right? It is awesome to hear that we can have some control of things like this in life. I do have a few questions though. How exactly might PC exercises help a woman orgasm, especially a woman who may not orgasm from penetration? Another question is what is your opinion on the weighted kegel egg-like things, do you think they are helpful?
Yes, Kegel and pelvic floor exercises are one and the same. And they really do work! In most cases of daily use, a difference can be noticed within a couple of weeks (as far as urinary control). As far as orgasm, orgasm is a series of muscular contractions of the pelvic floor and organs. So toned, practiced muscles can result in greater response. Orgasm is orgasm whether there is penetration or not. I don’t know about the pelvic eggs, but I can say for sure that they are not necessary.
Very helpful and informative!
I am glad it helped you. Thanks for reading! Keep your passion!
Good read, I didn’t know that men could do this to.
A lot of men don’t know, either – but they should!
Very helpful information. I myself have a family member who has issued as described in your writing and I am glad i can now inform them on way to improve their PC muscle so it can become healthier and stronger. This is also good information for me even though i am young I will strongly consider doing these exercises
The sooner you start them, the better off you’ll be as both young and older. But keep in mind that even if you end up waiting, it’s never too late. And if you slack off, you can always just pick back up again. That’s the wonderful thing about muscle!
I enjoyed the humor as well as the insightful information! what I find funny is I use to do these exercises before I knew what it was. I just thought it was a weird thing my body could do and it wasn’t till recently I learned what it was.
So I hope you keep doing them! You won’t be sorry. 🙂
I remember this was a trend on the social media site Tiktok for a while. Occasionally there were videos that would pop up where you were supposed to do Kegels to the beat of a song. It’s a really smart way to get people to do their daily PC exercises.
What a great idea. That sounds like fun!
Wow I had actually never heard of these exercises, good to know!
Yes, and the sooner the better – but it’s also never too late.
I am a crime junkie myself, so with the paranoia I have accumulated over the years from the tv shows, movies, and podcasts I have watched/listened to- I would not have drank from that coffee pot! I like to think I would be brave enough to look around the house, but I highly doubt I would have done it with the calmness you had!
It didn’t feel that brave because I didn’t really think someone was there. But … like you, I watch those shows and so I know the attack usually comes out of nowhere. Luckily it didn’t!
I wasn’t aware of the PC muscle until now! I remember as a kid, I heard my mother complain about urinary incontinence before she started doing yoga and other exercises. I thought this article was humorous and very educational. I’ll definitely be doing some PC muscle exercises from now on!
Something important for all of us to do.
We did this is class with Professor Naluce! What’s funny about this is that–incoming TMI–I naturally figured this out when I started masturbating, but I had no idea that I was exercising my PC muscle. I just discovered that everything I did was a lot more intense than when I wasn’t flexing the muscle, so I continued doing it. Originally, I’d thought of it as if I was commanding my blood to flow to that area. When Professor Naluce brought this up in class, it immediately clicked in my head that I’d been using my PC muscle! Now I never masturbate without doing it.
That’s so cool! And of course my cool friend Naluce is a fan too. 🙂
I really enjoyed reading this article! I knew the kegel exercises are important, but I wasn’t aware that men can do them also. I learned about it in my Human Sexuality class with Professor Naluce. I always thought that it was an exercise that NEEDED to be done for better sex and to prevent accidental pee incidents. I didn’t know that it can help with having a better sex life/experience. Maybe I should start doing them more often!
I highly recommend that! And that way when you are older and really need them, they are already just part of your hygiene program. Like brushing your teeth, haha.