I wrote my will last night…
In bed. In my head. But I will put it down on paper, just as soon as I get up the energy to get up.
Yes, I have some of my affairs in order. Several years ago, I asked my sister to go with me to prepare living trusts. That’s the thing you need if you own property and don’t want your will to go to probate. Probate is a pain in the ass for the person(s) left behind. If I die before my sister (and it’s likely I will, since I’m quite a bit older), she’s already going to have grief and many other pains in the ass, so why not remove some of them, if I can? I also wanted her to have her own trust, to help me in case she’s the first to go—because one never knows, right? I could be an old lady having to deal with it all. So we did the trusts.
But I had never gotten around to doing the will part. That’s where you identify things such as what to do with your personal belongings, your body, whether you want a memorial, etc. I did have a fantasy of what I ‘hoped for’ (Ha!) I pictured myself dying either at home or in some facility nearby. I wanted my sister to take the things that she wanted, and then have a party at my house. Invite my friends. Serve food and alcohol. Play Motown and Santana. Share stories about time spent together. And then choose items from my stuff that they like or need—photos, plants, furniture, kitchen ware, books, art, music. They could enjoy these things, and there would be less for my sister to dispose of.
But unless I die soon—and that is not the desired outcome, either—it’s unlikely that it will go that way. I am planning to move north to be closer to my sister, the only one left of my nuclear family. I know a couple of people there, but most of my friends from SoCal would likely be unable to come. I still want a will to make it easy for my sister to know what to do.
Why did I let this go until 3:00 a.m. last night? Because my own mortality was not actually real to me. In spite of my advancing age (I know: we’re all advancing—but you know what I mean), I’m pretty healthy. The worst thing is that spinal problems have limited my mobility somewhat. But that’s not going to kill me.
What might kill me? The novel coronavirus, that’s what. COVID-19. A global pandemic worse than any I’ve ever seen. If I’ve even seen a global pandemic. Maybe HIV/AIDS. And COVID-19 is a lot easier to transmit than HIV. To contract HIV, one must allow one of only four body fluids (blood, semen, vaginal fluids, or breast milk) into one’s own “portal of entry” (bloodstream, wounds, mucous membranes). Avoid a few behaviors (I’m not going to say simple behaviors, because sexuality is not simple), and if you do, you won’t get HIV. But to get COVID-19, all one has to do is touch something, or breathe.
I touch things constantly. I breathe on a regular basis.
And I see how quickly this disease progression can go. One day you’re healthy. The next day you’re not. The next you’re in the hospital. The next you’re in the ICU. The day after that, you’re dead. So many dead. Not enough body bags for all the dead. Not enough refrigerated trucks for all the dead. Families trapped at home with their decomposing dead. Unthinkable.
You know what else is dead? Right now, my faith in the democracy of my country. Oh, I’ve always known it was flawed. There’s been racism, sexism, unscrupulous politicians, corporate greed. Two steps forward and one step back throughout our history. Even when we had our first African-American president, young black men and women were being shot dead in the street by police officers who’d promised to protect and serve.
But what has happened to allow a failed ‘businessman’ (and isn’t that an oxymoron)—with six bankruptcies, thievery from charities (CHARITIES!), a draft dodger, a man who says “grab ‘ (women) by the pussy,” who has many sexual assault charges, who makes fun of disabled people and war heroes, who rejects science, who pretends to be Christian, who won’t allow refugees into our country (MY BELOVED GRANDFATHER WAS A REFUGEE, YOU MOTHERFUCKER), who puts children in cages (CHILDREN!), whose stupidity and inaction and obsession with what? his TV ratings! has let COVID-19 ravage our populace, and perhaps worst of all, whose constant buttlicking of business interests that remove environmental protections while climate change takes us all to our ultimate doom—how such a person could become President of the United States I will never understand.
Yes, I know the factors. Voter suppression. Gerrymandering. Russian election interference. Uneducated voters who mostly don’t even know what those clandestine activities are about. They just thought they wanted “something different.” Well, friends, you got it. We all got it. Along with the biggest stock market drop ever. The highest national debt. The most convicted appointees. The most pandemic infections in the world. So much winning.
I saw a meme on Facebook that said ‘Why would one lose a friend over politics? Because it isn’t about politics. It’s about morality.” I don’t want to lose any friends, but it is about morality, or as I think of it, a philosophy of life. One of my UCLA public health professors explained the difference between Republicans and Democrats this way: Republicans believe that this is a country of opportunity for everyone. Everyone starts at 0 and has the same chance to pull themselves up. Democrats say that would be fine if everyone really started at 0 and had the same chances, but they don’t. Some start in the negative numbers and continue to face lifelong barriers. My philosophy of living is that people who have more need to lend a hand to those who have less. Justice, fairness, kindness: that’s my philosophy and my morality, too.
Now I will make my will. I will listen to science over snake oil salesmen. I will self-quarantine because of my age. I will vote (Democrat, of course). And maybe I’ll try to regain hope that my country can still get its head out of its ass—someday.
(Art work created or inspired by Shepard Fairey)
Wow! What an inspiring and powerful post. I agree with you in every way. As a student, I just had everything changed on me in the blink of an eye. I am one who sits there yelling at the TV during press conferences when the “president” cuts off a reporter or yells that they asked a “very nasty question”. It makes me sick. What actually made me sick and what I am sick with (truthfully) may indeed be Covid19, as I came down with every symptom listed. I was lucky to be tested, and now, I too sit in self-isolation awaiting my results thinking what if this takes me down? What if I infected others when I didn’t have symptoms. There’s no cure, treatment, and even the resting system is throwing out false negatives, so how am I to be sure I’m in the clear. I am also a Democrat and I pray soon our country is able to thrive and move forward from this whole mess. Take care Lynda! You’ll be in my prayers.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. People who voted for Trump and still remain blind to his murderous ways just will not understand. I’ll be pulling for you to recover. Stay with your education no matter what! Education is what makes for a progressive society.
Well said.
Thank you, Doug.
Friendship for most people is a combination of affection, loyalty, love, respect, and trust. … Here you go again, it’s so obvious that you do not value friendship.Thank you Good bye Sent from my Galaxy Tab A (2016)
After 40 years of friendship, for me to call out a murderous president should not cause you to say goodbye. You were the one who posted that a friend who disagreed with you was not a real friend. 🙁
Words of wisdom jump off the page. Glad you ladies got the wills in place, but do your best to stick around.❤️
Thanks, Foster! We plan to!
I love you Lynda
I love you too Jen.
Hi Lynda.. it is too much!! Everything is too much. I am open for technology but I fall under the “late majority” of consumers. I had to learn fast on how to use Canvas and zoom for my work. Everyday I am being bombarded with emails from administrators, colleagues and students. Which one should I prioritize? Yesterday, after a zoom conference with my students I realized that our recording got corrupted. I spent hours and I mean HOURS trying to figure out what did happen and how can fix it. I am very eager type of person when it comes to identify the problem, find a solution and fix it NOW. I feel bother by the “waiting” for things to happen or procrastination. I move on “do not wait for tomorrow if you can to it today!!” Because of my impulsive and analytical mind, I get frustrated when I cannot find the solution for my computer technological challenges.
My agent who is working on my Roth IRA asked me who do I want to put down as my dependents.. in case if I die. DIE?? of course we are all going to die one day.. but F^#$*%, Lynda, really?? I am putting all this money away for my retirement and in the end I might not even be able to enjoy it after I retire because I may die BEFORE retirement?? Then, comes this diabetic scenario in which I find myself in, it now making me part of the “risk group” in this pandemic S^%*#. Oh great!! As you told me one day, I have never imagine me being considered as part of the “risk group”.. this S^%*# is real.. and it is scary!!
Then comes the time for me to go to bed. All this week I am feeling afraid to sleep. Maybe because of all this uncertain energy in the air, through the media, in my retirement package and because of my diabetic condition. The word “death” is everywhere and it is starting to affect me profoundly, like you Lynda. It sounds crazy but it is so true. In my thoughts I find myself saying “what if I die while I am sleeping?” I still want to change the world. I still have so much to fight for, including fighting for what I believe it is “moral” and for my “values”. Being to voice of those who are voiceless. Fight for social justice, for numerous problems faced by women and girls (and often, minorities) around the world that limit sexual and reproductive rights and prevent the achievement of autonomy. I guess I will make my will was well. And in my Will, I will designate “friends” to take over my “philosophy” and “morality.” Love and condoms are the answers we need to spread!!
I understand where you’re coming from, girlfriend! So many things have changed our lives because of this virus, it’s overwhelming. Yet we’re still the lucky ones because we are alive! But we certainly are confronting our mortality. I share your values, I plan to keep fighting for them – and I hope one day we see them spread across the planet.
Hi Mrs. Naluce! you are doing great! you are an amazing professor and even though our in person class time was cut short because of COVID you have become one of my favorite professors! I did not know how stressful this transition was for you. I feel your pain but coming from one of your current students you are doing an AWESOME job! Your love and passion for your work shows and it brushes off to all of your students! That is why your classes are always full and people still try to add. Your classes are like the sold out concerts! Your philosophy and morality is passed on to many students! You have left a imprint on all of your students, especially me! You have made me view things in a different way as well as making me feel more powerful as woman! I love you so much and i hope we can hang out after all this Pandemic is over! You are doing AMAZING! YOU ARE AMAZING! KEEP BEING AMAZING! I am sure all the mentors you have had would be proud of you! That is why you received professor of the year award! I love you!
Your student
Jacqueline Ocegueda
I did my trust also with my husband. His Mother passed a month ago not from Covid she had other issues. She had gotten her plot long time ago. Still so much left to do. I literally just thought the other day I have to be prepared.
Stay safe ❤️
It’s a good time to be prepared, Nelda! And you stay safe too. <3
Well said, Lynda! We need to make sure we escape COVID-19 and stay alive so we can vote for Democratic candidates in November. There is no way our country or environment can survive four more years of this pathetic, lying, self-centered, pompous, ignorant, science-denying lunatic who thinks he is brilliant when he’s actually just an ignorant, amoral schoolyard bully selling snake oil to those with poor critical thinking skills. Hopefully, enough people will finally realize the “Emperor Wears No Clothes” (along with his numerous other deficits) and get him out of office!
Stay safe and healthy.
Deidre
Great comment, Deidre! Yes, I definitely hope to live long enough to see his house of cards tumble.
Wow!! Deidre, my dear, you knew how to describe this mother f^&*) very well!! Perfect profile description.. it is really hard for me to understand how people can not see that!! Be safe and healthy!!
Could not have said it better. With everything going on in our world today, we do not know what tomorrow brings. I have family that have been torn apart because of politics but it merely because many of very uneducated and do not know the bigger picture. There is no way our world can grow and prosper the leadership that we have right now. Change is needed. Stores and businesses are starting to reopen, not because it is safe but because the government only cares about the economy.
I’m sorry about your family. I too lost someone dear due to her standing up for that criminal. At least your education does allow you to see the bigger picture. Education is something no one can take from you – and once you see, you can’t unsee, and you wouldn’t want to. Even with things opening, make your own decision to stay safe!!!
Good morning, Mrs Hoggan
As I read your blog it’s interesting that you mention the living trust . I can’t imagine not having something made like that for my kids . That is why in my life insurance I have a written statement of how I want the funds to get split up for all 3 of my girls . Due to all of the politics That we all have in our family I just in case that I my die young and my kids are to young to say do what the want . I have also signed a trusty but it’s hard to know who to trust now at days. It’s funny that you mention the time you thought about all that and you where writing at 3 am . It’s ironic that sometimes we find ourselves thinking about the unthinkable at what’s called the Spiritual time. I find my self also at times up till then and I start to think about everything going on in my surroundings, my bills, my kids, what if I die etc… especially with everything that’s going on with our surroundings this virus that our government knew was around but didn’t say much about it till it got out of hand . It’s sad to say that we now have to basically live in fear and the free world that we live in is not much as free world anymore. And now the riots it’s a crazy world I haven’t been around much say wow this again but I have been around to say well this what’s happens when our “government “ doesn’t do much for its people. As I have read about our history it seems that nothing has ever changed it’s still the same as in 1800’s to now. The only is that women have rights now and the African Americans are no longer slaves . But we are all Americans so I believe why can’t our “government “ do something to show us all that we have some rights . All of this democracy is crazy yet alone with our president saying things that are inappropriate or wrong our own leader. I will stop writing here because if. It I will just keep on going, but I have been reading your blogs and never commented . I love what I have been reading and I also the the fact that you express your mind. Take care of your self and stay healthy, good luck in moving closer to your sister . 🤗☺️❤️💐🙏🏻
Thank you, Lety, and the same to you. You sound like a very responsible parent to your kids. I believe there are some people in government who care, and that’s why it’s important to educate ourselves and watch what they do, because that’s how we know whom to vote for – not just by their words. Talk is cheap.
The explanation of the difference between republicans and democrats was enlightening. I’m not a political person, nor do I care to become one. I do agree political beliefs are a reflection of morality, and that’s a scary thought. I’m not against those who are passionately political, but I can’t seem to hold a conversation with those who want to shove their beliefs down my throat. This was very refreshing to read!
I’m glad you enjoyed it! That description of the differences was enlightening for me as well.
this was very interesting to read!!
I’m glad you enjoyed it.
Hi Lynda!
I have previously commented on this post, but unfortunately I don’t think I submitted it correctly. Not sure if it will show later but here is what I remember commenting the first time:
I absolutely enjoyed this post! I will admit that I was feeling uneasy at first when I read the title. “I hope she is doing okay” is the first thing I thought of even though this is the first time I stumble upon your fabulous blog! But I am glad you are doing well.
I admire how freely you speak about our current political climate here in America and I 100% agree with everything you said. I tried to understand the other side but my head hurts from thinking of how people really think this guy is doing a marvelous job at being president and how they would support him another 4 years! I can’t even begin to comprehend. With his true colors being exposed more and more by the strains of society, I can only hope people open their eyes and allow themselves to see how unfit he is for the title he has and, quite frankly, doesn’t deserve.
I pray to the universe and all other entities that more Americans, especially young Americans, take voting seriously this year. I don’t even want to think of the possible outcomes that can occur if he becomes president for another 4 years.
I love your metaphor “my head hurts.” (And now it reminds me of “I can’t breathe.”) My head hurts for the same reason. And I can hardly breathe thinking about how much destruction he could wreak in four more years. He’s ruined so much already. I hope more young people vote, too!
Thank you for your post. Even as a young adult, I have been pondering my mortality in light of the recent pandemic and revelations of our seemingly failed public health model. This country is great in so many ways, but it seems we are walking backwards on the most important things, such as environmental policy and racial equality, while advancing toward more corruption in politics and targeted racism in our police force. Perhaps the most chilling part of this blog post is that it mentions police officers shooting African-Americans…almost two months before George Floyd was killed in public. We all have a duty to make this country great again, but we must do it the right way.
Unfortunately, police killing African-Americans is an old story and ongoing part of our history. As one who protested for civil rights in the 60’s, it’s disheartening to me that we are still there. But it does encourage me to see so many white, and especially young white, faces. I agree with your comment about walking backwards – let’s make it stop! Voting is one of many things we can do.
I believe everyone should write a will as soon as their legal to do so cause honestly you just never know. Dying itself doesn’t scare me. It’s leaving my son behind, especially when he is so young.
That’s a scary thought for any parent! At least one should have one’s affairs in order, to the best of their ability.
Powerful message! I love the analogy you used to describe both political parties. And it is true. Dyiing without preparations and will can be really overwhelming for family members who are grieving. A recent unplanned death in our family has been not only difficult to process but has also been financially difficult.
I always knew there was a reason why I gravitated to being a Democrat, but until a grad school prof explained it, I didn’t understand why. I’m sorry about the death in your family. Hopefully that difficulty will spur people to make proper decisions.
Hi Professor
I have not done my part in politics but as this Covid Pandemic has hit close to home I have been more vigilant. I have been suffering from the stress or everyday life and balancing everything out. I have been telling my mother that a trust needs to be put in place. Sadly she does not think it is necessary. I tell her we make our bed and we shall lay in them one day. However, when my time comes a celebration of life is what I would like. Something like your wishes. Everyone can keep a piece of my treasure and remember me by the great things I did.
I’m sorry your mom isn’t taking it more seriously. But you can only do so much.
Hi Professor Hoggan!
I connected to this post in many ways I feel as if anyone who read this they would connect to what your saying. Crazy we are in a Pandemic its a nightmare everyday death is all you hear and read about. After reading this I called my sister so we can talk to our parents to start preparing for the future because the future is now and you never know what tomorrow has planned 🙁 This pandemic and politics are hard to speak about but its happening and hopefully soon there will be justice, fairness, kindness like you said, thats a great philosophy to live by. Stay safe thank you for sharing!
-Katy
I’m so glad you and your sister are talking about how to be proactive during this crazy time. You stay safe, too!
I had been waiting for 2020 because this was the year I planned on graduating with my bachelors. I did! but I really wanted my parents to see me walk on commencement day. I am the only one in my family to go to college. I am first generation American and college student. But this year brought so many struggles that have really made me seen how unimportant my degree is. My mother aneurysm surgery was postponed. We are all so worried. My grandmother 97 years old is really concerned about contracting the COVID-19 like most older people. I am really worried for all my family. I know people that have had the COVID-19 and were not too ill and also others who are on oxygen and another that has been in the hospital for three weeks already (and she is in her late 30’s). I can’t believe what the President does and says. It is seriously a joke to have him in the white house.
Loved this post! I also really liked how you compared democrats and republicans. I am taking an American Government course and learning about our two party system was interesting. I have to agree with you on that matter as well.
I’m glad that comparison made sense to you. It sure did to me the first time I heard it.
I lost a friend over my disagreement with Trump. “It’s just politics,” she said. But to me, it isn’t! It’s values! And the things you describe are reasons why my values are not in line with his. I hope you and your family are able to stay safe.
What a powerful post! I agree with everything you said. You’re such a good writer you should publish your memoir asap. I really want to read it!
Thank you for reading, Jill! And I hope you get the opportunity to read my memoir, too. 😉
Hello Lynda
I am a student of MTSAC. Congratulations to you and all Americans, Trump’s failure, this is a good thing.
I agree with you that “Democrats say that would be fine if everyone really started at 0 and had the same chances, but they don’t.” So the Democrats are more care about recial discrimination and refugees. But there are many people who are not being followed in TV or NEWS. The people are car workers, coal miners or construction workers…. Because of globalization, Internet companies, refugees…, Many jobs have disappeared in the United States, and they have no hope of becoming software engineers or stock traders. In a movie,”American Factory”, A father sadly said that his hourly salary in the glass factory is 12 dollars which is dangerous and hard. His daughter, a manicurist, has an hourly salary of 15 dollars.
President Obama could not change racial discrimination, but people saw hope in Obama, so he became president.
Trump is a liar, but this liar gave some Americans hope. So he also became president. Democrats don’t need poor white votes.
Democrats may not need poor white votes, but poor whites definitely need Democrats – only many don’t realize it. Democrats tend to be the ones who push bills for social justice, economic solvency, etc. Circumstances for the people get better when Democrats are in power, I truly believe.
Greetings Professor Lynda,
I know you posted this back in April so it’s kind of crazy to look back at how bad things were a couple months ago and how worse they have gotten. I can’t understand how so many people still voted for someone like him even after his poor management of COVID and crimes against humanity. You’re right it’s not about having different political views, it’s about morality and human rights. I have cut off my own uncle because he said he “didn’t wan’t to pay higher taxes”. It’s selfish for someone to only be thinking about money while POC are being murdered by police, LGBTQ+ rights are at risk, and his own niece(me) is a DACA recipient. Not only that all the children and women in poor living conditions in those cages and enduring sexual assault. I think this year I saw peoples true colors and how some value their wallet more than the live’s of others.
You certainly bring up reasons why some people think someone like Trump is going to give them a better life (lower taxes!), but the truth is that his tax cuts only help the very rich! And in contrast are all the people who have been hurt by his policies. I suspect you are more educated than your uncle, and therein lies the value of education – a wider perspective than just our own little bubble.
Hello Professor Lynda,
I never imaged how the people around me, would be like or do after my passing, you made it seem so peaceful and comforting. But unfortunately, you’re right it won’t be so easygoing. This year I went through my first passing, which I grateful for. Just does not make it any easier. This opened some conversation to the family, about the things being disturbed. A will is something that does need to be put in place but it’s just so hard and a bit uncomfortable to get the conversation started.
You’re so right that such conversations are hard – and some relatives resist them completely. Still, I think it’s good to push a little, because the consequences can be so great. It’s heartbreaking to imagine that someone’s last wishes are not taken into account, just because they weren’t known!
It may be vulgar, but your entry is raw, genuine, and passionate. And I empathize your feelings COMPLETELY. I can’t emphasize anymore what the obvious has brought on to many of us, especially Democrats, because it’s personally exhausting. I like your explanation of the comparison between Republicans and Democrats, and I agree to your philosophy that it is about morality. I appreciate that. It may also sound bias or Democratic-like, but friends wouldn’t have to be lost over morality if they thought and felt the same way. As far as the idea on friends and the Laws of Attraction, “you are the five people you surround yourself with” or “you are who you attract”. Political and social issues aside, I also empathize deeply your decisions to have set up a trust and plan your will. True, it is morbid to think of, but it is the reality of aging. The outcome of what the pandemic has brought with the hundreds of thousands of lives lost to it to date is so much more of a reason to act on it. It’s preparation that will help lift potential burden off loved ones.
Wow, this pretty much sums up how I viewed both parties. I agree with you on the part about politics being about where you stand morally. I also think one side tries to deal with more severe problems that will negatively impact our future. I am glad to see that there is someone out there that cares about the next generation.
There are many of us who care about the next generation, and I can safely say that more of us are Democrats. Not that the party is perfect, but it is trying.
I typically avoid books, articles, videos, really anything regarding death as a topic. Personally, I find death eerie and unsettling despite it being inevitable. Ironically, I decided to read this article anyways – which I am so glad I did. Your words are unfiltered and raw, furthering my interest. Because a lot of young people like myself have no “real” threat (as far as being a young healthy teenager) to contracting COVID, it is easy to forget about the impact. However, there are moments where I think about the worst case scenario, how I would handle it mentally, how my family would handle it. It is unsettling and uncomfortable to think about. It is this position of uneasiness that we as humans need to experience to better our country. It is beyond me the role the President has played throughout this pandemic, and I have lost family members and friendships due to a different of opinions (though it is hard to have an opinion on racism, equality, etc. in my eyes). I am not a far right winged supporter, and I am not a radical left marxist, but I do agree with your philosophy of justice, kindness, and morality. Until we can collectively reach that as a society, it is imperative to be prepared – most especially in todays world.
Today’s world is a crazy time, and COVID-19 is about to get way worse for awhile – so please take it seriously and be as safe as possible! I certainly agree with you that racism and equality are not just “opinions.” And as for the ‘President’ (I shudder to call him that), he is proving every day how unsuited he is, and people are dying because of it. I hope the Republican senators grow some cojones and stand up to him for a change.
My mom loves to joke with me that I’m second place to get all of her stuff in her will after she passes, first place is her cat Chewbacca. Also, I can’t really view my self get really into politics since I view the current political climate as “You’re either with me or against me,” where both sides are fighting against each other instead of working with each other.
Well, if you’re for working together, maybe you SHOULD get into politics! We need more of that.
I still remember that time I learned about a living trust/will was when my mom passed away very suddenly. I knew what they were but didn’t think neither myself or my family would need it. Most people don’t think about setting these up until “later” because it is a lot of tedious work. It was a lot of unneeded pain on top of dealing with a loss. I don’t own much currently but I think I will work on getting it done once my possessions/properties grow.
Your key point is how it’s a lot of pain on top of loss. And some families are shattered apart by arguing, when it could have been dealt with beforehand.
Hi professor!
I never thought of a will or a trust before. I didn’t even know that we have those legal papers to ensure our property handling to the ones we trust after we pass away. Thanks to the course, now I know that we need to be prepared for our death. I see the connections between the Covid 19 pandemic and the spread of racism in this country. They are both killing people and make people suffer. I am working in a covid unit. I write down the name of the dead patients in the census everyday I work. We didn’t have the body bags for the deceased the other day. I heard the refrigerator trucks are full. We ended up having the patient’s body in the room. It is truly scary! This pandemic. I hope it will go down soon since we have the vaccine.
Oh my gosh, you are one of the many heroes of this pandemic! What a horrible situation for anyone to work in, too many dead to take care of. Yes, I’m hoping that the vaccine is soon widely distributed, especially with the variants coming along. Please stay safe, and it’s never to early to start thinking about what legal instructions to leave.
Hello Professor Hoggan,
I am a current student of your Mt. Sac, Bio 5 virtual class. Last week we addressed topics that go hand-to-hand with these topics: health care, aging, and dying. I came to read this post because it relates to those topics and I wanted to see how you reflected on the topics most of us in class experienced as life-changing and truthfully struggled to grasp to the reality of dying.
I’m glad that you live near your sister now, having family close by is always important, I think our bodies naturally feel better when our loved ones are near.
As I write this post, we are in the second month of 2021 and fortunately, Mr. Trump is no-longer our president! Although I try staying away from fostering negative feelings toward anyone, our former president made a lot of choices that put our lives at risk. Especially the lives of those whom were already affected by life-threatening illnesses.
In the past years, Mr. Trump made choices that affected the lives of the underprivileged, our health, the health of the planet, among many other ill actions that greatly affected all Americans. Mr. Trump was unfair and careless as a president, his actions cultivated the popular opinion of many Americans, “he’s worst president ever!” Making it hard to argue otherwise.
I hope this year is better for everyone! As democrats argue, everyone deserves a fair chance!
You give a very succinct summary of the harm done by Donald Trump. It’s not about politics, it’s about right and wrong. We need to do right by ALL our fellow citizens.
Hi Professor Hoggan, this post made me consider how I would feel about writing my will. Hopefully I won’t need to do so for many many more years, but you definitely have me thinking of how much pain I would want to alleviate for my family and friends as well. I enjoyed reading about how you would want your sister and friends to go through your things after reminiscing about the memories they had with you. That doesn’t not seem like such a bad idea. I might consider telling my family and friends to do the same, while reminiscing with old videos and possibly good food so that it can seem more like a celebration of life rather than a loss.
I can also really resonate with a few of your final words of how “people who have more need to lend a hand to people who have less.” Sadly, there so many people that don’t agree with this philosophy and it definitely showed the last four years. Let’s continue hoping for the better while using our voices and platforms, no matter how small they may be, to advocate for change.
-Tiffanie Melgar
Thank you for your very thoughtful consideration of my musings. Yes, I think all those uncomfortable things need to be dealt with. I too hope for better but say get out there and fight for what you want, if you can!
How nice!! It makes us feel good for being professors of the future!! This student just got accepted to her Master’s in Speech Pathology at USC!! She is amazing, isn’t she? 🙂 Naluce
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Love seeing our students succeed! Thanks for sending them to my blog.
Yea I agree with you. Things change too quickly and suddenly. We went from perfectly normal to being in a pandemic in just days. Who knows what will happen tomorrow. Geat thoughts!
Yes, it was quite a shock, unforeseen by most of us (though not Dr. Fauci!) We never know what’s coming around the corner, so best to be as prepared as possible.
What an inspiring post once again Lynda you always seem to surprise me through every post I read. I feel what you are feeling through all the facts and points that you have made. I hope too that one day this country will get it self straightened out. I too also vote democrat but in my opinion I feel that it is slowly going down hill no matter what party is in charge. I can not wait to read more of your post and will be looking for new post in the hopefully the near future.
Thank you Vicente! I’m glad you’re enjoying my posts if not exactly the direction our country is going. So far I don’t post often, but I will be posting more as I get closer to my book publication date next year. (Publishers want you to be as public as possible.)
Hello,
This is very interesting and most impressive. This is the truth about reality, what would happen if we died suddenly? What would we leave behind? How would our love ones feel? This is the truth about reality and the depression that keeps on building more questions about life. I never really thought about making a will because I’m still young, but maybe I would after reading this blog. My grandfather past away suddenly in March of 2021 and I was so depressed. I had a similar situation that you went through, thinking about life and if our dang country could actually fix itself. But what I learned about dying is that once the die, we can’t go back to do the things we could have done. That is why I’m going to appreciate life everyday and hopefully do something right for once. Even though my grandfather has passed, he done everything in his life to make change for everybody. He played a role to who I am now and hope to be like him someday when I see a young man like myself. Again, I love your blog, it really have you thinking.
I love that this post got you thinking about your grandfather – and how to be a good man like him. <3
You are truly an inspirational writer. Every single post/article that I have read is just exceptional. I like how in this post you went from talking about your will to our democracy. Although they are two different topics, you made it work perfectly. After I finished reading this I didn’t even realize so many topics were included until I reread the title and it reminded me of what I started off reading about. Truly amazing!
Thank you so much! Maybe you will enjoy my book that’s coming out next year as well.
Loved reading this post! I may never know what you are currently going through and it must be scary having to write a will and have your affairs in order as you get older. Reading your posts made me realize that as a 20 year old college student I am indeed not running out of time to choose a career path or to just live life. I hope things get better for you and more manageable in the future and will look forward to future posts!
Thank you! You do have time, but then again, nothing is promised – so don’t waste your precious time! But you can still spend a little of it on my blog LOL.
Hi very great meaning I think that every one when they think of righting the will they would react that you would like for them to be killed but its just to keep everything settled and ready for something that will happen.
You never know what will happen. My parents’ deaths were easier because they had wills. When my grandfather died without a will, it put a lot of extra hardship on the family.
This blog really opened my eyes on what I wanted to do before I die? I have a sister and I don’t even want to think about death but it’s reality. Reading this opened my eyes that I really need to think about this stuff. I cannot wait to read more so I can see what else is in store.
I’ve made a number of decisions with the thought of my younger sister. Wanting things to be easier for her when I die.
This really opened my eyes on what I wanted to do before I die? I have a sister and I don’t even want to think about death but it’s reality. Reading this opened my eyes that I really need to think about this stuff. I cannot wait to read more so I can see what else is in store.
I’m glad you’re brave enough to face the reality of death!
I’m in awe. I can’t seem to understand how what I began to read as a will ended with politics and your own views on morality. I enjoyed reading this because of how real it is. My parents recently wrote their will and it seems terrifying yet it’s real. The only thing we have promised in life is death.
When I wrote this, I wasn’t sure where it was heading, either. Sometimes that happens with writing or any art. Glad your parents did the responsible thing.
This article is everything I have been feeling throughout this entire pandemic and Trump era. I am convinced we would have less deaths, less people hospitalized, and more people vaccinated if Trump was not president when this began. I have never felt so divided as a country and as much as I try to overlook my friends being Republicans, another friend pointed out that to accept them is to accept injustices, racism, etc to name a few. I have blocked and unfriended a few facebook friends because of their posts of disbelief of the pandemic, and support of Trump and his lies. My mother lost her best friend, my daughters god mother lost her mother to Covid, and just this weekend an ex co worker (who refused to get vaccinated) passed away in a hospital after being on oxygen since the beginning of July. Also I do need to get my mom and my husband and myself wo write a will.
This article really reflects on my own feelings as well for this country. I first thought this article was going to simply discuss why you wanted to write a will and how one was going to fear death. But as it went into depth, it began to talk more about the country’s political issues and how someone as inadequate as Trump was elected to lead our country. It makes me ill knowing that even til today, there are people who still admire that man and see him as an iconic figure in history after everything he has done.
And that blind worship of Trump continues, unfortunately. 🙁
I really liked how you thought of your family member by making a will, I haven’t really thought about this until I read your posting, and I’m going to plan on making one soon
It really is a good idea, although some don’t like to think about it.
I have been really enjoying your journals and interesting stories about your life because I can relate quite well to your morals, your passion and your personality. You make it seem easy to talk about these things and make me want to be included in the conversation.
That’s a wonderful compliment! And what I hope to accomplish with my writing. FYI: I have a book coming out next July. I will be posting here when it’s available, if you’re interested.
I did our living trust back in early 2000s. It was paid by my work and an attorney prepared it. It is actually in a big binder but it also contained our wills and directives. I always thought it was a package deal. Either way it is one last thing for your loved ones to worry. Also its hard to believe that you originally posted this blog coming up to two years ago. We still have the pandemic and are we better off now or before. It is hard to say. In my opinion, they are all corrupted in some way with their own agenda. The bad part is we the people are suffering. Going back to your will Professor, did you get around to doing it?
I did get the will done, thanks for asking! Yes, the pandemic has certainly shown us some things. Thanks for reading!
Good evening, Professor Hoggan
I’m just catching up on your blog, we definitely have different political views, but that’s what makes this a great country different views. I personally hate all politicians every single one of them are liars, like there pay is 174.000.00 dollars a year, but their all millionaires living in mansions, and they all claim to care about the people. Well let’s not talk about politics, I wrote my first will when I was 19 years old and was on my way to Somalia, Africa in December of 1992, and have always kept it up every year since then, because I do not want my family to worry after I’m gone, hopefully I’ll be here for another 50 years. Again very interesting blog I’m a fan I will continue to follow it even after my course is done.
Good for you for having your will up to date! I’m also fine with people having different political views. I’m not OK with someone inciting an insurrection in order to undo an election that didn’t go their way. I’m glad you enjoy the blog, and I hope you’ll keep reading.
Wow, this post is really uplifting. You said it all Ms. Hoggan. I really love the fact how you have pointed out these problems, but most especially how you have also brought awareness to all these problems. Thank you for that.
And thank you for reading, Victor.
I personally can not speak about politics with my family or else we wouldnt be family anymore. we can never see eye to eye and you were very smart to write your will and have everything arrange in case you go before your sister.
It’s so painful when family and friends’ views are vastly different from ours.
My whole house being democrats and seeing through republican eyes is very different. We all have the same way of thinking. We want the world to be safer and Trump did not make that happen. Personally I think we saw more death and violence under his presidency. He did the United States wrong and blinded his voters to think he would “make America great again” Such bull to be honest and I never saw a good side to it!
I could not agree with you and your family more!
Hi Professor Hoggan,
I really enjoyed this post. I am a paramedic and was deployed to some of the worst affected areas in the United States with COVID-19. I felt like I was walking in to a death sentence every single day I reported to work. I continued to go because if not us, then who? Coming up with an advance directive and will was something that was very difficult for me to do. I was 28 when the pandemic struck. Day by day I saw my fellow brothers (Paramedics) fall victim to the virus. One of our close friends ended up on a ventilator. He was also 28. Luckily he survived. My medic partner Alan & I were the last two men standing of the original deployment team at the peak of the pandemic. Tired, short on supplies, medication & manpower really made it a terrifying time.
What an amazing job you did, in spite of how hopeless it must have felt.
It really is such an odd thing to think about our mortality . Not until I read this blog did I even consider my will or a trust. Im still young , well relatively ,as I look over the horizon I can see my 40’s approaching. These are issues that should be dealt with with ample time like you said in order to make it easier for your loved ones. The last thing they would want while grieving is a headache in having to deal with legal matters. Honestly I’m not even sure if my parents have wrote up a trust or will . Well I guess I’ll be in for an interesting conversation when I bring it up at our next dinner.
I hope you brought it up and it was received well. Some people just can’t handle talking about it. But your point about grieving AND having legal issues is so right on. Worth the conversation!
This post honestly opened my eyes even more. Especially with how you pointed out these problems, but most especially how you have also brought awareness to everything that has happened. It being almost 4 years after the pandemic first began, I can only say just how scary it was at first. I missed my final 2 years of high school to this and was never able to experience the basic high school experience. Being able to understand what went completely wrong in our government and all the hate it brought into our country was just honestly completely eye opening, especially as a daughter to immigrant parents.
I’m a granddaughter to immigrants, so I understand what you mean. So sorry you lost those high school years. And I’m genuinely worried for our future since so many people still follow that criminal asshole.